


3 A.M

by korecob



Category: Lore Olympus (Webcomic)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Basically episode 102 with more backstory added in, F/M, Hades realizes what he wants, Hes crushing hard, Imagining what it'd be like to have Persephone has his queen, Late night with Hades
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23390227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/korecob/pseuds/korecob
Summary: It's a late night and no matter what, Hades's mind continues to run wild thinking about everything that he's been through in his relationship with Minthe and his new budding feelings with Persephone. He decides to give expressing his feelings in writing another try as his therapist suggested, even if he's still not very fond of the idea
Relationships: Hades/Minthe (Lore Olympus), Hades/Persephone (Lore Olympus)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 75





	3 A.M

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time publishing fanfiction after four years of not writing any at all so I really hope that this story isn't a bad one to get me back into this world of writing fanfics! (Pls be nice to me I'm really trying) I another WIP that I'm far more nervous about putting out there since it'll be more your traditional story, but I'm still hoping that this one won't let you readers down!

Wednesday, March 21st

3 A.M

I hate to admit this, but maybe my therapist wasn’t completely bullshitting it when she said that writing letters would be a good way to express my emotions. I’ll never let her know that though, these are just gonna stay between me and my typewriter. Absolutely no one else. I’d much rather no one find these and have such easy access to my thoughts and emotions, especially right now.

Considering that it's only the early hours on a Wednesday morning, it's already been the longest week that I’ve had in my thousands of years of being alive. Hell, it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that this has been the longest ten days of my life. 

It started when I met the spring goddess, Persephone. Aphrodite had overheard me at that dumb party Zeus invited to and she decided to play a little prank on me by getting her absolutely wasted and then set her inside my car to find once I had gotten home. Her intentions had been cruel, but without that extra push, I don’t know if anything would have gotten as far as it has now.

Our relationship is definitely a complicated one with many obstacles we have yet to jump over, but it's worth it. 

Persephone is worth every sleepless night where I stay up staring at my ceiling, wondering if it would even work out between her and I. She’s only 19 and has this beautiful, naive outlook on the world and I admire it. I wish I could think about the world like that, with such bubbling optimism in every single thought and idea, but I’ve seen far too much that has ruined the chances of seeing things like that again. Persephone gives me hope though with her kind way of being. She makes me assess myself and wonder if I just completely stopped giving everything a chance because I didn’t think I was worthy of it due to how many negative things I’ve endured.

One of those things being love.

I don’t understand why I’m still with Minthe. When we first started dating she took it on so passionately. Every look I got from her had been filled with such warmth, love, and appreciation, but somewhere along the way, those eyes went cold. The spark only ever returned for a moment and I would cherish that single moment like it was the last one I would ever get.

Some days she wanted me and other days I felt like a thing she dragged around to make herself feel more secure. Some days I would be holding her close in my arms, her lips running along my jaw pressing eager kisses. I’d run my fingers through her soft hair and do my best to make her feel as loved and appreciated as I could, whispering sweet nothings to her as things grew more hot and passionate.

Did I ever get the same emotion back?

No, she only ever took, accepting my end of things but never once saying or doing anything just for the sake of pleasing me. I put her wants into consideration every time, paying attention to her feedback even if sometimes it was just frustrated insults that I hadn’t been doing something right. I didn’t dare speak up or even try to ask for something in return after the first time I had and she snapped at me, narrowing those cold red eyes of hers, and getting up to leave my bed. I knew she would have taken it as me being selfish when in reality I just wanted to feel the appreciation that she used to feel for me when things had just begun. Maybe it was better that I never tried to tell her.

The nights I had my recurring nightmares, waking up with my heart pounding and my breath shaky as I tried to remind myself it was just a dream, those same red eyes looked at me. It wasn’t a look of concern or even of reassurance that I would be okay. It was just a harsh look of pure disappointment that this happened so often and that each time I woke up in such a panic.

“Shouldn’t you be used to this,” She’d tell me, turning her body to face the wall rather than me as I tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to run down my cheeks. I couldn’t cry, that came with enough torment from her too that I simply didn’t need then.

Even in our work life, our toxicity managed to spill itself over into it. She would get so fed up with how busy I got even though she knew it was something I took pride in. Being the King of the Underworld comes with a lot of setbacks, but I still want to make the most of my role. I understand how important it is that we work hard to manage all of the souls that come down here. If we were to completely stop for a single day, it would create so many problems. Souls would pile up and it would be hell for Hermes and Thanatos to manage, not that I’d pity Thanatos at all but I don’t mind Hermes, he's a good kid. Not to mention it’d create problems for me once it was time to sort them into the different sections of the Underworld.

Ah shit, I’ve gone on a tangent again..Where was I?

Oh right, Minthe.

She would get upset when I would have to push our plans because of mandatory meetings I couldn’t do anything about. I wish she could’ve taken the time to consider what I have to do every day instead of immediately making me feel like the bad guy for having this demanding job. 

If anyone knew how big of a pain in the ass it could be to be king, it would be me. Her guilt tripping didn’t help...as if I didn’t already know how much I had hurt her with this unexpected change of plans. No matter how I would try to tell her that I would make it up to her, and gods did I always try to make it up, she would give me the cold shoulder and leave. It wouldn’t end there though, if anyone is the queen of ignoring someone for days, it was Minthe. 

I feel like I’m walking on eggshells when I’m around her.

I have to make sure I word things in such a particular way to avoid upsetting her and I’m tired of it. No matter how careful I think I’m being, I always seem to step on a landmine that leads into another frustrating argument. She would always yell and when she wasn’t her voice dropped to a menacing whisper that was so much worse. There were times I’d prefer that she would yell angry pointless things at me than have her look me in the eyes and quietly tell me how frustrating I was. She dared to accuse me that I was the argumentative one when I was only ever trying to calm down the situation and talk about it normally rather than having her blow up and cause a scene. Did I argue back and tell her that she was in the wrong?

Never. Knowing her, an even bigger explosion would come out of that.

It’s times like right now that make me wonder why I’m still with her.

I don’t feel loved. In the last few years we’ve been together there's been very few times where I felt that she cared about me, but those moments seemed to grow cold too. She’d be asleep, her head on my chest after she had come back to apologize about what she had done. My hand would still be rubbing her back soothingly as I tried to get myself to fall asleep, but my mind would only wander. Was she only here to make herself feel better or did she really mean what she had said? Did she come to make things better or did she only come to seek comfort after her days of ignoring me and feeling guilty in her apartment?

When I woke up that next morning, I could tell she was trying to make things better as she came to greet me with a kiss and a mug of coffee that she had made for me when she woke up minutes ago. It was sweet and it definitely made me happy. It put some of my thoughts away from the night before, making a warm tingly feeling run through my body, but I continued to notice this pattern as it kept happening after our fights. 

After so many days of experiencing the same damn thing, I was just waiting for next time where I would somehow say something wrong and she would lose her temper again and cry out how insufferable I could be sometimes.

After a while, even that stopped hurting. Sure it wasn’t amazing to hear someone drag you down, using your insecurities completely against you, but you learned to expect it. You put up your walls and simply wait, and you hope the next time you’ll be stronger and won’t want to cry when she angrily says you deserved to spend all those years trapped and alone. It still sent a shooting pain to my heart because I had been able to trust her with all this information, hoping maybe she would help me embrace what I’ve gone through instead of using it to tear me down. At the same time, I knew to just expect it and after the initial blow was over I would just feel numb. 

I’d go out to the balcony of my office and stare out into the Underworld with its neon lights that made the place seem more lively than anyone from Olympus would expect. I would contemplate how I had even gotten here, how I ended up in this mess, but then I remember how sweet her face was the first time she had said she loved me. The way she used to do her best to go to all the dumb family brunches even if she was intimidated by being around a bunch of gods and I could never blame her for that. My family is quite the critical bunch, especially Hera and Zeus, and she quickly picked up on that. Even still, she would try her hardest to put up with it and gods did I appreciate it. I felt horrible seeing how uncomfortable she could be in this situation. It made my heart sink to my stomach as she looked at me from across the table with an insecure look in her eyes. So when she asked to stop going I didn’t see a reason to say anything otherwise. If she wasn’t comfortable going why would I make her go?

Slowly after that though, she started flaking out on me more and more leading up to the night I met Persephone.

Maybe I’m glad she never showed up to that party. If she had, maybe it would have resulted in more angry arguments rather than the lovely relationship I’ve created with Persephone. 

Persephone is so sweet and thoughtful. Through everything we’ve been through together, she always takes my feelings into consideration along with hers without forgetting what's right and what's wrong.

When she opened up to me about her feelings, I could tell how difficult it had been for her yet she did her best to push through. I haven’t been so direct with my own feelings. I’m sure she’s caught onto it though from our many close calls of kissing and all of the flirting between the two of us that there is a spark that I have for her. Even with that information that same day she did the right thing, addressing my relationship with Minthe and how it wasn’t right to be doing all of this behind her back. 

Persephone could have easily taken advantage of our mutual feelings and gone with it, but instead she thought of what was right and fair for all parties, and it's things like that that draws me to her even more.

For only being nineteen, she was so insightful and mature, even more so than me at times. Yet at the same time, I can't forget how she was an absolute goofball with her witty jokes that never failed to make me smile and her naivety to all of the things, in both Olympus and the Underworld, that she had missed out on from by being raised in the mortal realm.

Of all the things Demeter must've worried about, the last thing she would’ve thought of was her old “friend” having a crush on her daughter. Or at the very least, that it would’ve been me who fell head over heels for Persephone and not Zeus or Poseidon.

I wouldn’t have ever seen it coming either to be completely honest, but I can’t deny that this liking I’ve taken to Persephone is extremely strong.

I can’t call it love yet though. I haven’t even known her for a full two weeks yet and I still have yet to learn so much about her. I want to know the things she likes to do on her days off and her favorite kinds of movies. I want to know everything she’s ever wished for and the things that drive her to be the amazing person she is today. Every day I get to spend any time with her or text her when we aren’t busy, she always seems to surprise me with something. I’ve learned not to underestimate her in any kind of way. She may be young and inexperienced in many things, but she is a powerful woman who is capable of so much. And as she gets older I know she’ll only grow to become more wonderful than she already is. 

I’m so utterly happy that she’s in my life and that I even got the chance to meet her. I guess I should get around to thanking Aphrodite for this eventually, it's definitely going to give her ego a boost that she doesn’t need but it would be the right thing to do.

Even if Persephone and I never lead to anything serious, I’m happy to have even experienced knowing what it's like to have her as a part of my life.

She’s like the first burst of sunshine after the winter. Here in the Underworld she’s such a stark contrast to the dark and gloom of my realm in a way that's so refreshing. I like hearing her opinions and her point of view on many different kinds of situations, but most of all I simply love her company. 

Persephone never makes me feel foolish for the things I say. She never looks at me with cold eyes, only warm ones that glimmer with curiosity and the yearning to learn more and more. Hell, even the one time she had every right to be as pissed with me as she wanted, Persephone never raised her voice once. She sat with me and talked it out, pouring out her genuine feelings even if it was difficult to do so.

I think in that moment something really clicked for me. That experience with Persephone showed me that what I had with Minthe wasn't normal. Of course, I had known this before the fact, it wasn’t hard to read all the red flags in our relationship that were clear indicators that the whole thing was toxic beyond belief, even before Minthe had gotten so mad she hit me.

With Minthe there was only fighting. Trying to discuss anything with her always turned out to be one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done with how stubborn she could be. Once Minthe decided that she was right, she’d do anything to prove it to me or somehow make herself the victim in the situation and guilt trip me until I caved in. I’d apologize even when I knew I hadn’t done something wrong just for everything to finally stop.

Persephone wasn't like that. She was gentle with her words but still used enough emphasis to show that I had clearly upset her by assuming it would be okay with her to go ahead and take that reporter's eye out. We just talked, and in a way it was nice. It was new to me not having someone blow up in anger with you and never give you the chance to hear your side, even if you were in the wrong like I was in this case. She didn’t get frustrated or screamed out to me that I was a lost cause. She was calm, her fingers even intertwining with mine for a moment as she asked me to set things right. Of course, I agreed and seeing the way her eyes lit up, knowing I wouldn’t leave things the way they were, made my heart soar.

Persephone, in just the ten days I’ve known her, has been able to bring out the best in me. Honestly, I can’t remember the last time I smiled so much or got so excited whenever my phone went off signaling she had sent me a message. She makes me feel so warm and tingly, and that scared me at first. Like I said before there are so many things that will get in the way if we were to pursue a relationship with one another, but any roadblock would be worth it just to be able to hold her hand freely and get to tell her how much I love being around her.

She helps me feel safe in a way that Minthe never really has. 

I can say with full confidence that if Persephone witnessed me waking up terrified from a nightmare that she wouldn’t lie there quietly, staring at me in disappointment as I tried to hold back tears. She would sit up and move closer, reassuring me that it would all be okay as she rubbed my back gently and wiped away any shed tears off of my cheeks. She wouldn’t go to bed until she was sure I was okay and even then I’m sure she’d stay up and make sure I fell asleep again before even trying to go back to bed herself. She’d be under my arm, holding me close and absentmindedly running her fingers over my many healed scars. She wouldn’t say they were ugly like Minthe had before, instead she’d tell me to embrace them as they show that I’ve gotten past that troubling time when the other five traitors and I were doing our best to bring things to order.

Writing this all out...I can’t help but feel a little guilty in finding myself so happy in imagining her like that. It’s making me feel too happy, and even if we aren’t in a good spot, I am in a relationship with Minthe. 

I had once thought Minthe would make an okay queen along my side, even going ahead and buying a ring to propose to her the night of the party. Maybe her never showing up was fate’s way of telling me it was better to not go ahead with that plan. 

Maybe I should listen to that.

Thinking of Persephone ruling along my side makes being the King of the Underworld a much more desirable role. Getting to roll over to see her gorgeous face in the morning and being able to softly laugh at the wild bedhead, which she must get by how much hair she seems to have at times, makes me happy. We could have breakfast together as the dogs yap at our feet, waiting for any possible crumb of food to fall from the table so they can happily join in on the meal. 

She could teach me more about the mortals and understand their way of being and I could teach her more about the parts of the Underworld I adore. Persephone seems to like to bake too, maybe we could even do that together. I’m sure it would make her happy.

I don’t know if the Underworld is a place fit for a goddess like her, but gods would I do everything to make sure she felt happy and comfortable here as my queen if she would give me the pleasure of being her king. 

It's 4 A.M now...I should probably go ahead and do something more productive while I’m up.

I hate to say this, but I think writing all of this out did help me align everything together and figure out what I need to do.

I won’t keep my hopes up about Persephone, if anything ever happens between us I’d be more than happy to take it slow and learn more about her before even considering a full blown romance with her. I want her to be sure this is something she really wants before she agrees to that. Dating me might change a lot of things for her and I wouldn’t want her to ever regret that. She would always be the happy little ray of sunshine I love and the spitfire that only a few have experienced, but if our relationship got as far as marriage, her image may change. The title as Queen of the Underworld would come with a lot of assumptions from the other gods and beings that didn’t know her prior to the change. 

How would Demeter even feel about her daughter being the queen of a place that was the complete opposite of her realm!

I probably shouldn’t worry about that as Persephone and I aren’t more than friends at the moment...I’ll think about that when we get there...or if we even get there…

Gods now is not the time to overthink that.

What I need to do is talk to Minthe before it gets too late and I never have a chance to see what it would’ve been like to be loved by the lovely goddess of spring.

If I got anything out of this tonight, it's that I now realize how suffocating this crush is for Persephone, but I don’t mind it. She makes me feel loved and good all the time and honestly, that's everything I’ve wanted for years now. I need to make the most of this chance and go for it.

But first...I need to talk to Minthe...

I can’t keep doing what I’m doing with her, and as much as I know this is gonna hurt...I know I’m doing what's best for both of us, she deserves a better chance at love, and so do I.

Whatever happens with Persephone, at least now I can do it without that horrible feeling in my conscience that I’m doing something wrong and I'll be able to accept as much love as possible, without overstepping any of the boundaries we’ve set of course.

I feel good…

And I can say that with full honesty that it feels so good that things are so clear in my mind right now.

Goddamn it that therapist really wasn’t bullshitting me...

Well, before my courage runs out I should go talk to Minthe. It’ll be better to do this sooner than later.

Wish me luck.

Sincerely,

Hades


End file.
